27 replies to this topic

[brado]

hi my name is brad, and i am addicted to keeping fish.... my problem is i spend far tooo much time looking at- and for fish of all varietys,
my wife doesnt like my fish, or the amount of money i spend feeding my lil habit... what can i do to find a happy medium??

[Sarah Jayne]

..

Edited by Sarah Jayne, 03 January 2014 - 07:44 PM.

[Cawdor]

Find out exactly what is bothering her about your hobby. If it's mainly money, curb your spending or do more trades. If it's time, set aside days you two do stuff together. If she wants you to give up your hobby, time to look for a new wife

[werdna]

Buy her the box set of desperate housewives and do fishy stuff while she is watching it.
Wait till something she likes is on TV that you cant stand and tell her while she is enjoying her show, you are going to be doing fish tank stuff.
If you tell her just as the program has started she will tell you to stop talking and leave and not to interupt her anymore.

Also, hide spendings by inventing "trades"

"Yes honey, I know it doesnt sound realistic, someone on the forum traded my 4 electric yellows for this brand new 6 foot tank. I am just as shocked as you are. See how much money I save by spending time on the forum"

[gilz]

Find something in the hobby she likes. That's wat I did.
Colorful fish are the way to go. I set up a tank with electric yellows and such. She loves them
Started breeding bristlenose she loves the babies.
Now to keep the interest going I'm setting up a salt water tank so "she" can have "nemo" hahaha
Now my girlfriend comes with me to the lfs. Haha

[Mr_docfish]

Breeding easy fish like bristlenose catfish is a brilliant idea - the girls love it, and you can get trade value to upgrade/get new, and if you get the odd bit of cash every now and then, give it to her and say it is for the power bill (and remind her that you could have worse hobbies - like drag racing)

I went though several girlfriends before the one I have now said to me "no rush, when you finished feeding your fish then we can go out".... so I married her.... and now I have my own LFS.....

now in hind sight, I dont know if getting married or starting a LFS was a good idea..... but I still get to keep my fish tanks, so that's a bonus in itself.



This is one of a few hobbies that can actually pay for itself, so look at keeping fish that are easy to breed and dont need lots of big tanks to raise them... talk to your local FS and get them to commit to something that they need regularly (Electric Yellows, Bristlenose, Mystery snails, or any other medium sized fish that your local recommends... but get their word that they will not reneg on the deal.

[Cawdor]

"I like the pretty blue one, you should get more of those"

Anything positive that offsets the occasional bitching about how there are too many tanks in the house is a good thing. So I'm looking for Placidochromis phenochilus "Tanzania"

[Ronny]

When I bought my 9x2x2, it cost about 1300 for the tank and stand, I saved up 2500 and bought a lil car for the ex to practice manual in.
I didn't hear anything about the money I spent on the tank lol.

Also, keep a mental not of all those little things your missus wants but doesn't buy for whatever reason.
Those are the things you buy when you buy fish lol

[bradfitzy]

It cost me a wedding for my fish shed......... that stopped her complaining.

[nick05]

Buy her the box set of desperate housewives

Which is your favourite season Andrew?

[gibbs]

Divorce her!

[Fox]

Discipline abuse Hey Ant..... bahahahahahahhahhahah

Show her who's boss buddy..hahaha jks

[Donna]

Dear Addicted,

First ask yourself,

Am I susceptible to hobby addictions or obsessions? (e.g. You have hardly used SCUBA gear, half built cars, or the like in your shed)

Am I the type who will simply swap one obsession for another? (see above)

Are you using your hobby to help cope with reality, or is it becoming your reality?

Are you lying about the money you are spending, or being dishonest about the amount of time you are spending on fishkeeping and related pursuits?

Are you thinking about ways of distracting your partner so you can "get wet?"

If you have answered "yes" to any of the above questions......

Welcome to our World

If you answered "yes" to point one, looks like your partner will have to just love you for the obsessive person that you are There is an up side to having an obsessive partner. It gives you time to pursue your own interests. I would try and cultivate your partners interest in something outside the house...get her out of the way, so you can "stim" at will

Love some of the advice above too.

Edited by Donna, 22 March 2011 - 08:12 PM.

[brado]

hahaha you guys are gold! theres a baby on the way so that puts divorce out of the question... (for now hopefully bubs will keep her occupied
hhmmm x2 babies = x4 fish tanks???

[golden_dase]

Find out exactly what is bothering her about your hobby. If it's mainly money, curb your spending or do more trades. If it's time, set aside days you two do stuff together.

IMO, that is a very true statement..
Brado, have you tried talking to her about your fishkeeping hobby?

My missus lets me keep as many tanks/fish as I want, as long as I prioritise it over family etc...
Luckily she loves fishkeeping too! haha!

Edited by golden_dase, 22 March 2011 - 07:52 PM.

[Donna]

Good strategy brado,

Keep her holding and occupied with fry!

[sandgroper]

Time to up date to a newer model, a mermaid perhaps.If all else fails you could take her shopping and loose her. I read a bumper sticker once it said, lost wife and dog reward for dog. cheers steve. P.S most of us can relate to your situation.

[bigjohnnofish]

i tell the missus "you pay the power , water , phone , insurance(s) , rates , rego(s) etc.... and i'll give up the fish tanks...."

dont know why it seems to change her mind everytime.... lol.....

[posiedon]

Haha i rekon this is the best thread yet ..

Dont worry im in on the same boat , no more dinning room now holds 5 tanks and yes it gets brought up in every argument some how!

[Fish Antics]

Its a never ending battle! My wife hates fish! Came to a compromise, a fish shed but no tanks in the house! Now I have my shed full of tanks I am trying to get "One" Display tank inside.
I have to say, I enjoy having the hobby to myself, I dont have to share my hobby, and when I go to my fish shed it is My time


Tony